Maybe I’ve been going back too much lately to when time stood still while I got to know your pretty face and electric soul. We were lost in the labyrinth of the woods. What was happening to me? I prayed he wouldn’t look into my eyes. If he did, I had my anticipatory answer ready: “Nothing to worry about. It’s just that my eyes are sweating.” Because I saw the ETA on the screen. Read more...

On New Year’s Eve, I was flipping through the pictures in my Facebook album. It calms my heart to relive my happiest moments. I took a long pause at the picture of you and your daughter. I started to think Does she have these pictures in her possession? Should I forward these pictures to her? I didn’t act on it because I knew it’d never go beyond messages. For the last four years, I’ve wanted more than that. Read more...

Just when I was dying to call it a year (my year-in-review), something interesting happened in the dawn. My sleep schedule for the past week has been messed up. Long gone are the days when I woke up at 5 AM or earlier. So, I badly wanted to pay off my sleep debt last night. At about 4:30am today, I woke up to a thud1, as if someone had broken the main door. Read more...

I’ve asked myself this one question a million times - “Do you want an easy life, or do you want a difficult one?” In the past, I’ve made choices that seemed convenient for the moment - something which takes away my pain instantly. But, I’ve failed to weigh how I would feel about it a few months, or a few years down the line. I’ve wished I could go back in time and fix it. Read more...

For over a year, there had been rumours about some unthinkable things about you. For the sake of temporary happiness, I brushed them off and chose to live in denial. My reality came crashing down when, on one fateful day, she presented me the artifacts of your self-incrimination. I screamed at her, “PLEASE STOP THIS. I beg you. I can’t listen to this any further.” She didn’t yield because she stopped loving you long ago. Read more...

I feel alive when I do precision sports. Years ago, I did rifle shooting. In early 2024, I picked up compound archery at college, and I looooved it! During initial days, I’ve bruised my elbow with string slap until it turned purple. As my form improved, it became so much better. I wished my archery classes were 8 hours every day (instead of 4 hours per week). I’m on a break from archery for reasons related to work. Read more...

Ever since I can remember, I loved being around you and my three sisters. I always feel the warmth of love and comfort from you, as if I’m your youngest. My mom narrates the story of how I create a mess and run into your home, and how you and my three sisters feed me dinner from your own plates. Not only that, she never forgets to remind me on how I demanded PB akka to walk me to school on the very morning she landed in India. Read more...

Capturing some of my fleeting thoughts - Someone said, “When you say goodbye, you die a little.” At every place I’ve lived, and every street I’ve walked, I leave a small piece of my heart until there’s nothing left of me but only tears. (place) I pack up my courage to love you with all of me only moments before departure. What’s the worth? (place, person) Distance and isolation become the bittersweet consequence of loving you too late. Read more...

There’s something very special about being 26. I became everything that I said you were at your 26 - indecisive, fickle-minded, cold-hearted, a heartbreaker. Life made me say things that you once said to me. I broke his heart by saying, “it’s not my time to care about other people’s problems, but to focus on my career.” The cold-hearted part of me said to myself, “yup, he was right. he suffered then because that’s what god wanted. Read more...

seeks out sorrow. makes the world’s problems its own. cries when its time for departure from a place. perceives it’s calling, and yet it pulls strings to run away from it. realises that another name for Seattle is heartbreak. learns to read in between the lines. loves wearing rose-tinted glasses. regrets not meeting her for one last time. knows going back home is never the same. sheds acid tears for her. Read more...